I was feeling a bit stuck in my spiritual life and I needed to do something about it…
It’s still very clear in my mind what I asked Him in that Campaign of Israel: “My Lord, do whatever is needed so I may mature and grow in my spiritual life.”
I presented my sacrifice and moved on. Not long after, my husband and I were sent to do the Work of God in places I had never imagined I would go, and then the new experiences began. My journey to spiritual maturity…
I faced spiritual deserts, difficult situations, fear, and disappointments.
On a particular occasion, a terrible thing happened to me and I felt as if I had lost the ground beneath my feet… No one really understood how I felt. It was as if a void had overwhelmed me. It was a spiritual desert.
I remember praying and feeling as if there were no one listening to me, as if I were alone.
One day, as I asked God to show me what to do, the truth hit me right in the head: He reminded me of what I had asked Him and showed me what my true spiritual condition was. I was weak.
God showed me many things when I went through my trials; I know there’s much more to come, but this time it was different. He was showing me that I was not all that strong. I was not firmed in Him as I thought I was, but in people around me.
The penny dropped and I cried out to Him and, since that time, I always pray that He will not let me deceive myself into thinking that He is first in my life when, in fact, other things (people I love) are.
I learned that if God is in first place in my life, even if the world comes crumbling down, I will never feel lonely.
I will love You, O LORD, my strength. The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer;
my God, my strength, in whom I will trust;
my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.
I will call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised;
So shall I be saved from my enemies. The pangs of death surrounded me,
and the floods of ungodliness made me afraid.
The sorrows of Sheol surrounded me; the snares of death confronted me.
In my distress I called upon the Lord, and cried out to my God;
He heard my voice from His temple,
And my cry came before Him, even to His ears.
Psalm 18:1-6
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