Thursday, 4 February 2010

For the Single Ladies - Self Love

Task # 5 for the Single Ladies

I was 15 years old when I begged my father to let me start dating. He insisted on telling me that he would allow it only after I was 20…

So one day, the guy I had a crush on came and asked my father for permission.

To my great surprise my dad approved!

A year or so later I was completely passionate about him, when I discovered that he had been cheating on me left and right. He even cheated on me in front of my friends who never said anything to me out of pity.

He broke my heart.

It’s one of the worst feelings I’ve ever felt. You feel worthless, like nothing, garbage!

While angry, I didn’t think twice, I picked up the phone and ended the relationship there and than, but shortly thereafter a mound of thoughts came into my head...

“But I love him so much…,” “What if I give him another chance?” “How will I live without him???” “I lost him…” Waaahhh….

At the same time, however, something much stronger inside of me made me overcome all of those feelings…

Something called self love!

He asked me to get back together with him many times, but I stood by my decision and the more my friends and family said that I wouldn’t resist, the more resolute I became.

We never got back together!

My friend, how can you say you have Jesus and not have self love?!

Women and girls today don’t give themselves the value that they deserve which is why they are frustrated, unloved and unhappy.

Please don’t confuse this with pride, it’s not that at all, but we need to love ourselves!

If he betrayed you, broke up with you, didn’t value you, it’s his loss!

Trust yourself and your potential, don’t view yourself as worthless!!! No way!

Overcome all bad thoughts and doubts brought by the devil and look straight ahead!

I’m not saying it won’t hurt but it will certainly pass and you will later see what you were saved from.

We need to love ourselves like our Lord loves us and value ourselves the way He does!

How can you accept leftovers in a relationship while your Lord has a whole banquet set up for you?

It doesn’t make sense!

I write this message especially for a friend that wrote to me today asking for advice over a boyfriend that broke up with her. ..

So he treats you like trash and you would still like it if he asked you to give it another try?!

I have two words for the ladies that are in this same situation…

Self Love!

Task #5

“You need to value, love and believe in your own potential and above all believe in your God!

If you believe that God is with you, how can you view yourself like a looser?

That’s not possible!

It’s not enough to say that you love God; you must love yourself as well!

Starting today you will stop saying negative comments about yourself!

From today on, you will never repeat phrases like….

Oh, how I’m dumb!

I can’t do anything right!

I’m never going to get it!

Or any other phrase along these lines.

Remember…. “I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.”


  1. this is one thing ive been sruggling to do!self-love..i always see myself as one more young lady out there...but with time i started to love myself..thanx miss fernanda.ill certainly put it into practice.thanx again.collene

  2. Wow these single Blogs are great Mrs. Nanda, thanks for them all. Self Love is extremely important as you said if we love Jesus then how can we not love ourselves when we have Him inside of us, it doesnt make sense. In addition we are what we think. If we think were no good then we will probably attract those who are no good. Once again thanks for the Blogs

  3. oi dona Nanda, muito forte, quantas as pessoas que tem perdido o amor proprio, por alquem que nao lhe dar nenhum valor,realmente ainda pensam que pode ser orgulho nao volta o relacionamento!ser deu errado, der gracas a Deus, e olha pra frente e creia que Deus tem coisa melhor pra voce...! beijinhos

  4. my challenge will be to stop to be selfishnnes to my husband .when i found out that i was like that even those many time my husband he tell me many time .i learn a lot not be self , thank you Mrs Nanda

  5. I learn about caring i realise that most of time i was not care about him much more even those i was thinking that i was doing that,through this study ilearn what is care and i will put action

  6. This day it was a wonderfull day to me and my husband. because i found out how to handle or commiction with my husband in peacefull way .many time i wa ask my self what can i do ,to improve my marriege it was my reguest .to day God use a woman of God to help us .let GOD to Inspire u much more

  7. This is such good advice, will be helpful in future.


    S Ulume

  8. JENNEVIAH Thank you mrs Nanda for the blog and i learn that
    if i do not love myself who will like me.and i than God for open my eyes for me.GOD BLESS YOU BIG SISTER AND USE YOU MORE!

  9. It's true, the thing is everyone wants to be loved; and everyone in my opinion deserves to be loved.However if you don't love and value yourself first, it will be almost impossible if not impossible for anyone to love or value you.

    You know the saying "treat others the way you want them to treat you?" well i think we need to apply it to ourselves- to treat ourselves the way we want others to treat us!

  10. Its true Mrs Fernanda

    I remember having a friend who was in the same situation: she had an abusive relationship with her ex-boyfriend. He abused her, cheated on her many times (with her some of her friends!), and made her life a living hell. When I heard this I couldn't believe that she went through all that and all she did was ALLOW herself to go through it. "Everything will be ok", "Things will get better...". ladies I tell you what I told her:

    "Don't you think you're worth more than that?"

  11. Women and girls today don’t give themselves the value that they deserve which is why they are frustrated, unloved and unhappy.
    Most of girls is like this,even me as unbieliver before i used to be like this..most of them they are easy to give their impurity but in the end they are blaming others,..this very strong advice Mrs Nanda to use only the mind and not the emotions as a girls have...
    Thank you!


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