Friday, 12 February 2010

For the Single Ladies - Your # 1 Enemy!

Task #9 for the Single Ladies

“So, aren’t you going to find a boyfriend?”

“How about you, when will you get married?”

“Hehehe, you’re turning into an old maid!”

Look at how much pressure!

Just the other day I caught myself saying one of these phrases to my youngest sister-in-law, what lack of sensitivity on my part!

It escaped! Just after saying it, I felt angry at myself… “I expected more from you Fernanda!” I thought.

Really, it mustn’t be easy to support hearing comments like that.

Relatives and friends have no idea how something apparently so innocent, like the comments above, can lead a person to a state of great anxiety. They can even lead her to take decisions that she will regret for the rest of her life.

When you act based on this anxiety, you are acting by emotions and the results will certainly not be good.

I have a friend that knows this very well…

She was almost 30 when her family began to pressure her. They began to ask those little questions and many times they took it to the next level…

“Your biological clock is ticking! You are not getting any younger!”

“Do you want to be a granny-mom?”

So, anxiety struck…She began to worry about her love life. She forgot all about her spiritual side, she stopped trusting God and decided she had to solve her problem; after all God didn’t seem to be listening to her.

She began to date a guy and in less than six months they were married. In a year’s time, she was already having her first child.

Wow! You might think. How great, she solved her problem!


While pregnant with her child, she discovered that her husband was betraying her with her best friend.

When she confronted him about it, he decided to leave her!

Ok, I don’t even need to reveal the rest of her unhappiness for you to realize the big mistake she made!

My friends, I know it isn’t easy to overcome the anxiety, but it’s possible!

Don’t be taken away by comments or thought that the devil may bring, for he works in your mind with this feeling called anxiety.

Of course you have to do your part, but you must also trust God!

Seeking and waiting for the right person is worth it, I can prove it.

Know one thing: anxiety is your number 1 enemy at the moment!!!

How do you overcome it?

Here it goes…

Task #9

“First things first, if you want to be blessed in your love life, you must do your part! Here goes a list of things that you need to do…

  • 1. Start a purpose with God and participate in the Therapy of Love on Saturdays in the Universal Church.
  • 2. Don’t be silly, show up presentable and with your best face. Don’t forget about the mints in your purse. Always!
  • 3. Be alert because there are others there with the same intention as you, so look around.
  • 4. If you don’t see anyone interesting, don’t give up, remain firm.
  • 5. If you do find someone, don’t rush. Make it a point to get to know his character.
  • 6. Avoid being idle, for it is at that moment that the devil will attack with thoughts. Occupy your time! Get involved in a church group; get busy with the work of God. Evangelizing and visiting hospitals are great examples.
  • 7. If possible, have friends and go to the cinema, eat out, go shopping and things of this sort.
  • 8. Take a course! That’s right! In your struggle against anxiety and idleness everything goes! If the problem is money, search for something online and make an effort to learn! I have two cousins that speak fluent English; do you know how they learned? On their own! At the time they didn’t even have internet, imagine if they did!!!
  • 9. And the last tip, it should have been the first one because it is most important! HAVE GOD ALWAYS IN FIRST PLACE IN YOUR LIFE.

"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” Matthew 6:33

I believe in this word, how about you?!


  1. Mrs. Fernanda, everything that you said is right. I also had a similar situation with a close relative of mine. Everyone kept telling her that she was getting old, and so forth... Ultimate result, she alone and in a huge legal issue, only because of a hasty decision.

    These examples serve to illustrate what anxieties do to a person. I am not married, but I am waiting for the right man of God for me. Despite the fact that I don't visibly see anyone, I know that God will greatly bless. After all why do we have faith? Precisely for this, we believe and have the convictions of things not yet seen. Thanks for sharing!

  2. yes..i believe in that too..because one thing i realised is that..all a person chases after is blessings and miracles and alot of things from god..BUT!..we dont actually chase after God!..because if we chase after God...he will let the blessings,miracles and all the things we lack chase after us!Just imagine this-all we do is ask god and ask and ask up to millions of times..and keep on asking him again and agian and agian!..but we dont chase after him and seek him.thats why i agree with you miss fernanda..about first seeking his kingdom and his righteousness,and all things will be added unto us!

  3. Hi Mrs Fernanda today I took two paper to write the quality and the negativity about my husband and I told him about the good quality that He has and He was surprised.Kisses Eliane Namibia

  4. Mrs.Fernanda today I did burn that paper about the negativity and the resentment or envy I don't have against him because I already understood my place in my marriage.Kisses, in Faith, Eliane Namibia.

  5. Mrs Fernanda, this article was a God send! I was asking God about the above that you was writing about and what I should do, thanks I will definitely put all of the above into practice while i'm waiting.

  6. Hi Mrs Fernanda yesterday my reception to my husband it was with caress,smile and today I prepared nice food to Him and that massage in his back and his feet He likes a lot.Kisses Eliane Namibia

  7. My task today it was for me do not complain with Him, because He leaves all the cloths in the living room sometimes , pee on the lid sometimes, today I did not complain about anything, even about the pee I don't complain anymore because this chores is my responsibility.Kisses Eliane Namibia

  8. I assumed all he could do even to wash the car I do wash and I prayed to God in what i see that needs changes in my married because i am sure that God answer my prayer.Today I gave priority to take care of his clothes and I did colour his nails again and all the attention that he needs.Thanks Eliane Namibia

  9. I prepared a nice coffee to my husband and today I called his sister there in Brasil and we talk and God blessed. Thanks Eliane Namibia

  10. My task today is wonderful, I made a list of things that I need to do to improve my appearance, so that my husband can look at me and see the wonder woman that he has at home.Thanks Eliane Namibia

  11. Very helpful..I am 30 and can really relate to this article. With all the comments I heard around that I am getting older and should get at least a boyfriend ( I can't find the one yet), anxiety kicks in. Thanks to this, afterall, who would wanna have a broken marriage out of a rush?

  12. I am 30 and can really relate to this article. With all the comments around, exactly mentioned above, anxiety is really our number one enemy. It is hard but it is possible to fight against it.

    I am fighting it!!!

  13. This is so true Ms.Nanda. In my case it's not my parents its the work field. They keep pressuring me about my youngness getting old and wasting this time I have in front of me. But I know exactly how it is to be pressured in that are. But I trust in my God with my love life which he knows whats best for me.

  14. I understood that I must sacrifice for me to be happy in my married,and I pray to God about my husband to God change Him where needs change.Eliane Namibia

  15. I do trust my husband, that he is faithful to me, because I see his character, that he is faithful first of all to GOD,Thank very much to my God for that, HIM is the FIRST in our relationship.Eliane Namibia

  16. I faced many things with my husband but I forgave him, and for sure he also forgave me because I am not perfect, I just love him, thanks God for that, even today if he does something that is pain full for me, I just want my heart clean, I talk to him and we solve the problem, I think like this my FATHER forgive me everyday, why I cannot forgive or forget , no, no, I CAN FORGIVE ANYTHING, I put this inside my heart, to forgive make me very happy.Thank very much Eliane Namibia

  17. Hi Mrs. Nanda this is so strong and true, hearing those harsh words you wonder why this is happening to you but as you mentioned: When you act based on this anxiety, you are acting by emotions and the results will certainly not be good. The only thing no matter what people may say God wont let you down. A great lesson i have learned in this story that no matter what it doesn't matter what people say i should hold my head high. Ayanda

  18. A good friend of mine was also a victim of these kind of comments, and I too was guilty of making one of these insensitive comments. Let's face it, most people aren't out to put you down when they say things like this. I watched people making comments to my friend, one person even joking that she must be a lesbian! However, she took it all in her stride. She remained strong in her faith and trust that God would provide someone for her in the right time. And sure enough, she is now with her prince as I write this.

  19. Is this love dare not going to be continued?! :(

  20. Some good advice to take into consideration.

    Thank you!

  21. Sometimes people don’t realize how much those comments do hurt and affect the lives of people. When we are told the most famous line of all “you’re not getting any younger,” it does make us think. As we ponder on that thought we can end up taking wrong decisions in life just like your friend did. I’ll make sure to not put pressure on anyone like that and I will definitely keep myself busy with God so that I too will not feel pressured by any of these negatives words. Thank you very much for this message.
    Alcy Gomez

  22. This is true, if we want to be blessed with a correct man, a man of god then we need to follow or may I say be in the correct path. I thought this was so true.

  23. This is excellent, reminds me so much of myself before, anxious and worried about who it will be, where he will come from and so on. Before long I was already pushing my spiritual life to the side and putting my love life as priority. I had to stop and let God. I had to stop being idle and allowing the thoughts of 'when am I going to meet my prince' come out of my head. This was also impeding me to receive my baptism in the Holy Spirit.Only when I gave 100% to God, He gave me His Spirit.I am no longer anxious but I am trusting God to prepare the Man of God He has for me.


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