John, you see how Sonia’s husband is? He helps out with everything, right Sonia? Tell him…”
“Wow darling, just look at your dad, he isn’t like that…”
“Did you see how Paul is? As is saying… “You’re not like that…”
In my lack of maturity I used to do a great deal of that.
Although he never openly told me he disliked it, one day a friend of mine called me out on it. I, insensitively, used to do frequently- it really wasn’t cool!
To top it off, when I managed to annoy him I was oblivious to the fact that I had done something wrong…
Have you noticed that no one likes to be compared?
If you have siblings I can bet that you hate when you are compared to each other.
“Mary is prettier that Laura.”
“Sergio is very messy but little Paul is so neat.”
And that’s just the beginning…
Men aren’t the only ones that dislike comparisons. After I became aware of this bad habit this, I noticed many wives making the same mistake.
I’m not saying that they have a bad intention; I think that like me, they expect to get something good out of it.
But the effect is the opposite my friends.
These types of comparisons are many times degrading for them. It’s a low blow to their self-esteem.
Do you know what’s worst?
Most times we do it so naturally that we don’t even realize it.
My friend said: “Nanda, you always do that.”
In my head I thought “Always? What? It can’t be!”
And to my great surprise, she was right!
I started being more vigilant and perceived that I used to do it without even realizing it…
Dare- Task #22
“From now on you are going to do what I did. You will be more vigilant and stop making any of these sorts of comparisons.”
Your husband will greatly appreciate it!