Nanda, I agree with all of the advice that you gave that young girl. But you are definitely defending the mom.
You are doing what most people do in thinking that it's always the daughter's or son's fault and that's not true.
That young lady most certainly must follow your advice, not because she's wrong, but because with those "weapons" she is going to change her mother.
Of course that young lady must have defects, but we all do. Her mother should know that and value her, even more so if she is an assistant.
I say to you young lady, don't wait for people to value you, even your own mother and even if everyone blames you. Jesus know's your worth and He understands you and that's enough.
That was my opinion and in reality it was the young lady that was asking for advice and not her mother. This being so, it is she who has the power to change- do you know what I mean? My advice has to be for her and not for her mother.
And sincerely, I believe that a mother deserves respect and I perceived a lack of respect in the way she wrote.
I'm not saying that moms are always right, but it is necessary to understand that mothers are humans and can also make mistakes- even is she is an assistant. Assistants are also humans.
If she puts into practice that advice that was given, I'm sure that the situation will change. Feeling sorry for her and telling her how wrong her mother is won't change the situation, right?
I was also a daughter that had many problems with my mom, if I had only had a Christian foundation and advice like this, everything would have been different... I have no doubt about that...