Monday, 11 January 2010

Love Dare - Day 31 - The Right Place

Although I decided not to have children, I know that the bond between mother and child is like no other.

One day a friend of mine went to pay a visit to a mother that had just given birth.

The happy mother proudly carried the baby towards my friend. She uncovered the newborn’s face and asked “Just look at him! Isn’t he lovely?”

What do you say in a moment like this, when you know you can’t lie?

“Ohhhh, how cute……dubidubidubidubidubidu.” She tried to change the subject so as not to lie.

A mom forgives everything. Her child is always beautiful in her eyes and even when he’s all grownup, he will always be her little baby…

Many women make the mistake of transferring their love to their children.

I ask, where does her husband stand in all of this?

I understand that the bond between mother and child is strong but acting this way is not smart!

Want to see?

I’ll prove it to you with an example…

Sandra and Carlos got married and soon after decided to have children. They got along great but once kids entered the picture the relationship between the two of them began to grow cold, for all of Sandra’s attention was directed toward her children.

Time went on and Sandra lost the sense of closeness she had with Carlos, so she began to dedicate herself more and more to her children, her entire life revolved around them… take them and pick them up from school, judo, ballet, private lessons and the list goes on.

Her children’s love made her feel fulfilled and she didn’t mind that her marriage was now only a matter of appearance. She couldn’t care less about Carlos, her children satisfied her…

It wasn’t long before they started to date… “Gosh, how time flies!” She thought.

Her children married and left the house.

Sandra’s world turns upside down! She feels lonely, abandoned and without a reason to live.

To make matters worst, Carlos asks for a divorce!

“My God! What did I do to deserve this? Why are you doing this to me?”

Oh my friend! God didn’t do it! You did it!

God did not create us with the ability of reproducing so that we would make our children the priority in our lives! No!

After the Lord, first place must be occupied by our husband! If he is well taken care of, then he will surely be by your side for the rest of your life- not your children!

Sandra, if you would have placed your marriage and your husband before your children then you would surely not be alone today.

Well my friends, if you have kids or you’re thinking about it then maybe this message will fit you like a glove…

Dare- Task 31

“Analyze the state of your marriage and verify if your husband is occupying the right place in your heart. If not, make the necessary changes and begin to act in an appropriate manner.

My husband always tells me that back home when it was time for dinner, if his dad was not at the table my mother-in-law would separate his favorite part before the rest of the family began to eat….

This example clearly demonstrates what place he occupies in her heart.


  1. My husband certainly is occupying the right place in my heart. At this moment we are not planning to have a child but when that time comes I will remember this cause we already discus about this.
    Something to think about while not having a child.

    charlene (Namibia)

  2. This is an important lesson for us that are married and planning to have children, otherwise we will do things that will eliminate love from our relationship.Thanks a lot.


  3. This day is so special to me because it teach me who to treat my husband us the head of the house.

    Us a mother of one child I lean a lot that a child is a gift from God that need love, care and to be timed in the will of God .

    But there is something that we need to know, that one day he or she will grow up and start his or her family of their own but our husband will always be with us for the rest of our lives.


  4. MY husband will be the heard of the house even if a child come.that,s why if a child come we must learn how balance those relationship .

    Aina Namibia


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