Monday, 11 January 2010

love Dare - Day 34 - Fantasy X Reality

Since our TV fast ended today, I decided to turn it on at night and watch a bit to unwind.

I then saw a film that was titled “PS: I Love You.”

I never watched it before because a friend of mine had told me that it wasn’t all that good. However, last week another friend spoke so well about the film that I decided to watch it and draw my own conclusions.

Well then, here goes my conclusion… What a pathetic film!!!

Please forgive me my friends, if you liked it, but what else is there to say of a film in which the most perfect and marvelous husband in the world dies, but before dying prepares 10 letters and surprises for his wife because he doesn’t want her to suffer and wants her to continue living her life!

Do you know what happened?

During the film I cried like a dork and when it was over I was left with a sad feeling and then came the question… “Would Junior do the same for me?”

That’s when I woke up! I got out of the flesh and entered the faith!

This film speaks to the subconscious of single women in the following way “Look, you need to look for a man like that to marry! You won’t be happy until you find him!”

And it makes married women think “You see, your husband isn’t and will never be like that!!!”

Ahhh, please spare me the drama!!!

When the movie Titanic came out in theaters, years ago, my husband took me to see it.

I loved it!

It was so romantic that I left the theater feeling like I was walking among the clouds, imagining my husband was like Leonardo DiCaprio. Without thinking, I asked him “My love, would you do that for me too?”

You don’t even want to know what he answered!

It wasn’t the first time I asked him something like that. Each time we watched a romantic film, I placed my husband in a similar situation…

That’s when silly thoughts begin to arise; thoughts that can generate much confusion…

“He never says such lovely things to me like in the movie!”

“He doesn’t always bring me a gift!”

“He doesn’t always tell me he loves me!”

“He never cooks for me!”

“He never cuddles me!”

“Ohh dear, where is the romance in him?”

No kidding folks, I could spend hours fabricating phrases like these, for with each romantic film comes loads of comparisons!

Many times I didn’t say anything but I kept feeding that feeling inside, like if nothing he did was enough for me.

How absurd! It’s also very unfair!

I know I’m not the only one, many women suffer in their marriage just because their husbands are not as romantic as the men in the films they watch or the books they read!

Many even decide that the fantasy is much better than the reality and they completely give in to that world of illusion… They are addicted to romantic books and films, they live outside of reality and many times they even ignore their husbands.

How can we compare the characters in movies and books to our own husbands?!

How unfair! Those actors aren’t really like that, they’re pretending!

That romantic movie actor is probably unfaithful to his wife in real life!

Those comparisons make you look at your husband as though he is never good enough; thus, everything he does never amounts to anything compared to the fantasy!

Perhaps your husband doesn’t say “I love you” every morning when you wake up like in the movies (especially those movies in which the actresses never wake up with bed head hair, don’t snore, don’t sleep with their mouth open and never have bad breathe when they wake up!!!), but they do other things that you haven’t even noticed…

Dare- Task 34

“It’s time to wake up and set the fantasy aside. Learn to appreciate your husband without comparing him with fantasies and a world of lies that you watch in films. Appreciate the gestures that say “I love you” much louder than words.”

PS: Let’s be realistic!


  1. This is something that I use to do,compare my husband or say words that would make him small but during this days i learn who to Love my husband the way he is and this makes me to see the love my husband has toward me.

    This feelings is demonic we need to kick it out from our mind before we destroy our married with our own hands,thanks for this Love-Dare my eyes is open now.


  2. Thanks very much for this love-dare and my eyes are open. It really taught me a lot on how to appreciate the love that my husband has for me without comparing him with others from the world especially in the movies. It is true that these things of movies are fake-lovers not real.

  3. I thought marriage was bed of roses but how mistaken i was, now i realized how foolish i was before, that is why in the beginning of my marriage i could not understand many things and there where always arguments but since i have learned it the hard way i have learned how to appreciate him and things are so perfect now, we often tell one another how much we love each other.

    charlene (namibia)

  4. Oh mrs Fernanda my husband he does not like to be compare but i use to do it sometime i saw something on tv than after that i start to act i a way that i saw or read but thank that im changing and learn alot from this dare.


  5. One thing that my husband does not like is to be compared,the things on t.v seems so real but it is just acting.I like him the way he is and don,t want to change a thing in him.

    Aina Namibia

  6. Thank you for making me realise i cant compare my husband with actors. My husband is perfect just the way he is, the man God gave me and i apprectiate him and thanks God for that.



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