Monday, 11 January 2010

Love Dare - Day 24 - Beware of Accusations

If you’ve experienced being accused of something you didn’t do, then you know how horrible it feels.

Many wives act this way with their own husbands either because they are very jealous or possessive.

This reminds me of my first boyfriend- he cheated on me. When I discovered his betrayal, I immediately ended our relationship but the scar he caused stayed with me.

That first disappointment in my love life made me extremely insecure but I was too young to recognize it. In fact, there were times where my lack of confidence was so severe that it became unhealthy.

All of my relationships after that were terrible…

I wanted to know everything about him, I would call him every night (at that time cell phones didn’t exist- can you imagine if they did?! Poor guy!), I would imply things to see if he would crack, if we walked down the street I would constantly glance at him to see if he was checking out other women, if he dared to look at one then it would be enough to cause an argument.

A friend once confided in me that she was so jealous and possessive of her husband that she got to the point of following him.

Although he had never betrayed her, she accused him constantly! She would even throw jealous fits on the street, at his work place and at home.

It got so bad that her once faithful husband began to purposely betray her. He thought: “Wait a minute- if I’m being accused of something I’ve never done, I might as well start doing it because I’ll get accused of it anyway.”

That’s right my friends, that whole business of smelling his shirt, trying to control him by constantly calling and wrongly accusing him can have catastrophic effects on your marriage. Actually, it accomplishes the exact opposite of what you desire.

Don’t allow past relationships to come back and haunt your future- don’t carry that baggage with you.

Trust is the foundation of a blessed marriage. Without it it’s really difficult to assure a lasting and stable marriage.

In my opinion, it’s very hard to find faithfulness nowadays. You can even find love but love alone is not enough to prevent someone from going astray.

You might ask: “Nanda, wait a minute, first you tell me that I shouldn’t worry or be jealous and possessive but then you say that it’s difficult to find faithfulness even if you love each other! I don’t understand at all!”

It’s a double edged sword my friends!

That’s why we will embark on an invisible task... a fight, a war!

Please pay close attention to the following.

Only a man that truly fears God is capable of being faithful.

He understands the danger of falling into temptation and therefore resists.

He knows that the Lord scrutinizes even his most intimate thoughts.

He hates sin but loves and fears God!

If your husband doesn’t possess this fear, then this will be your fight from now on:

Dare- Task #24

“You will incessantly make purposes before God in favor of your husband. You will invite him to the services at church- even if he always says no, don’t give up.

You will pray for him daily asking that God may free him from all temptation and the biggest task of all- no more accusations; unless you’re ready to throw in the towel and give up on your marriage because that’s exactly what your accusations will do, they will lead you to a dead end where the only other option you’ll find is called divorce…”

This spiritual battle will have the one objective of leading your husband to experience a true encounter with God; He’ll become a man fearful of the Lord.

If your husband already fears God, don’t think that you are exempt of this task.

Our prayers are of extreme importance. We can’t stop praying for our husbands ever! Because even though they may fear God, don’t forget that the devil is constantly presenting them with temptations- isn’t that what he does with us too?

It wasn’t by chance that the Lord Jesus took the time to teach us how to pray and He even included the part “lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil…”

Evidently, if your husband is a ladies’ man that blatantly betrays you, then you must decide whether or not you want to continue with the relationship.

Remember to be wise and to protect yourself; after all, contracting a sexually transmitted disease is one of the risks you don’t deserve to take.


  1. yaaaaaaaaaaaay!! I'm so glad that the rest is up here (the new look of the blog is great by the way). Just one thing though. Dare 23 is not here. It goes straight from 22 to 24. I wouldn't want to miss anything.

  2. Hummm, let me check this out...


  3. Okay, 23 is there now... Thanks again!

  4. Okay I agree accusing does not change anything and I am the one left with the worrie's all day and not him.

    Will work on this daily and remember prayer is key for him to be liberated from thoses thing's.
    I used to be so jelouse when we were younger so bad like you were and it just caused problem's and more problem's . Now thing's have changed alot but I will admit I do sometime's ask question's thst are not needed or try to see if he will budge. But i will change that ass well.

    Thank you very much posting this Mrs. Nanda, It has been a exercise for my marriage and I am seeing result's here and there.

  5. I used to be jealous before so i realized that being jealous shows my lack of trust in him and if you love someone you trust cause love conquers everything and i have learned to trust him.

    Charlene (Namibia)

  6. This is a good advise on how to fight for my husband with prayers so that the enemy the devil will always be a looser,no matter what.

  7. It's very painfull to accusing some one or to be accusing because it destroy trust between couples,and a marriege without trust it can not stand.
    This day make me to examain my self to see were I have gone wrong with my words twards my husband before I chase him away or lose my marrige.

    We need to think before we say anything to our husband and to regret later.


  8. One of the weak point that my husband dont like he ever tell me about is jealous, if a woman is not controling her self she end up making commend that make the husband to be insecure and even if you see him talking with a person you wh to want hear what they a saying which is danger to our marriage i use to do this but thanks to my God i change now.


  9. I use to be so jealous that i wanted to go with him every where he goes,so i told myself that i need to trust him because he does not give me any reason to be jealous.

    Aina Namibia

  10. I do pray for my husband but now i going to pray even more. Sometimes a person really forget that satan is like a roaring lions just waiting for the opportunity. Thanks for this great advice


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