Wednesday, 24 August 2011

Are you ready for marriage?

I hear many young women saying that they are ready for marriage but many times, through interaction, conversations or counseling, I see how far they are from being ready.

Do you want to know a small sign but yet simple?

She does not respect, full stop!

She thinks she is a know it all.

She does not respect her parents. Nor people around her.  She does not respect anyone! But she thinks she respects God. How come?

Do you think she will respect marriage vows?

The naïve boyfriend, that all he can think of is the honeymoon, does not even care, does not think and does not see this.  If he’d seen, he would not marry her.

And so the statistics of broken marriages grow, although hope remains that she will understand the problem and change.

This, my friends, is just a small example I wanted to bring up for you to think about…

Respect is a crucial piece to a happy marriage.


  1. In the same way respect is needed to maintain a happy peaceful marriage is the same way one has to behave towards God. Why is this? Our relationship with God is not like a friendship but the same as a marriage. He is our first husband the physical husband comes second. For our communion with God to grow we must respect His will. Brixton UK

  2. Respect HAS to be found in a marriage, if there is no respect there is no love, how can you love someone you don't like to hear or don't want to hear? Like Neide said respect HAS to be found in our Spiritual marriage with God, we have to respect Him and the fact that He knows best. I've come to the conclusion that respect is necessary everywhere. Respect to our parents for they are our representatives of God, respect of our authorities e.g. teachers, for God placed them in our way, respect of our neighbours whom we are supposed to love as ourselves etc. Yes respect is definitely crucial, without it we will have the above result - a broken relationship, family, social life,friendships basically a broken life.

  3. Someone who does not have respect is often a very selfish person and only seeks to be pleased and have things done 'their way'. They have no respect of other people's will, opinions, possessions, thoughts etc. When a person like this gets married, they will have a big shock because a GOOD marriage takes mutual hard work, and respect is one of the top essential things for it to succeed.

    Before I could marry my husband, God had to change me from being a disrespectful teen, and I begun respecting my parents. Once He had done this, I was able to get married and show him the same respect I had found with God and my parent's.

  4. Respect is very important if we don't respect the people around us then how are we going to respect our husband once we are married. Its best for us to train ourselves now than rush into things.

  5. The foundation of where we need to learn respect is in our home because if we can't resepct our parents and those we see everyday then we are not capable of respecting the one in whom we will marry. These tips are very good to prepare us and I am grateful for them.
    Thanks for sharing

  6. that is true if there isn't respect that is impossible to be marrige, how can a person live with someone that don't respect that is rude.
    these tips are good to get ready to marrige.

  7. Hmmmmm, when people think of marriage they normally jump to the honeymoon, to the feeling of excitement and tend to forget that it's the sacrifice that comes after the marriage that will cause it to last; including respect. But not just the respect of parents, or any other authority, but the respect of your friends,strangers etc....It's about how you treat others. If you can treat others with respect irrespective of who they are so you'll be able to do the same with your husband.

  8. Mrs. Nanda ,
    Its true, the respect starts off in what we do in our Single life, if we don`t repect our parents, teachers,people around us - even ourselves, how can we respect somebody else - no way! thanks a million for the post, so that when we find our partner for life, we canalways have in our minds - "My God, Im i respecting my Husband"

    Tamika (South London)

  9. Marriage is every woman’s dream. Everyone plans her wedding day, picks her bridesmaids dress’s colour etc. When we’ve found the perfect person, we instantly think were ready to get married, but after reading this blog post, I’ve realised that this is not all it takes for a person to tick the ‘marriage’ box! Respect has to be involved, not just respect to the one were marrying but to everyone around us. What guarantee’s that we’ll be able to respect and submit the will of our husband after marriage. Once we already have respect embedded within us its easier for us to continue after marriage!

  10. yea, many people say that they are ready for marriage but only tend to look towards the honeymoon period or the whole excitement of the wedding but forget about the sacrifice behind the marriage that causes it to last.
    Yes; its good to show respect at home and to other authorities, but also its in the way that you treat your friends, strangers etc....if we can respect people irrespective of who they are then we also will be able to respect our husbands, once the honeymoon period is over

  11. Something I don't think about is marriage, but I know some day I will be married, and I thank you for this message because many want to be married for the wrong reasons, they feel as if a male will fill that void they feel inside, but that's not the case.

  12. imagine if we dont respect even oursleves how can we respect a husband and God. When we respect oursleves we watch to make sure we will not be foolish by acting this way. I have been like this before but then it was brought to my attention and I realised where I was disrespectful- we can change but we need to do this quickly.

  13. Respect is very important. In order to gain it you must give it. Some women rush into marriage too early but are they really using their heads? They have to analyse how they are with others before they think about taking care, respecting and showing love for another.


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